Friday, November 1, 2013

Malls and Mattresses

This is my first ever blog post. I've wanted to start a blog for a while now, but I of course procrastinated until it was no longer hip or cool and more of a necessity... like having a Chanel bag. Oh wait I don't have a Chanel bag yet either.

I'm typing this from my bedroom, which is overheated because the heat in my house goes straight to my bedroom. It's very annoying but I tolerate it because my bed is so comfortable. It's a tempurpedic. I paid a nauseating sum of money for it, so I kind of feel obligated to spend at least three hours a day sitting on it in addition to six or so hours a day sleeping on it. I've gotta get my money's worth, you know?

I worked on Sam & Cat today. I got off early, so I went to the mall. In an attempt to be healthy, I ate some terrible organic, vegan, gluten-free, soy-free, whatever-else-can-be-free kemp noodles in the food court. The noodles tasted like cardboard with too much mint and I wanted to cry as I was chewing them. I couldn't believe my life had come to that.

Once I was finished, I seriously considered walking across the way to Panda Express and wolfing down some orange chicken. The only thing to stop me was the fact that all the granola-ey Earth Food employees would have been judging me during my entire walk of doom. I could see them in my mind, healthy little toned arms crossed, visors tilted in a decidedly disapproving manner, wagging their fingers as if to say, "no, no, you poor, unfortunate, will-powerless soul."

It was tough to walk away, but ultimately I'm okay with my decision. I gave myself a pat on the back for willpower. And then I rewarded myself for the willpower by taking fourteen Wetzel Bitz samples from Wetzels Pretzels.

Progress.






24 comments:

  1. young lady, you need to investigate low-carb high-fat diets... then you can enjoy bacon guilt free and stay in fabulous shape...

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  2. Come on, Jeannette, Sam Puckett isn't concerned about her blood cholesterol, so why should you be concerned about yours?

    That said, why waste your daily junk food allocation on Panda Express, which is nothing more than mediocre fast food disguised as Chinese food? Either eat real food, or eat better junk food.

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    Replies
    1. Jennette's not her character. You're not her dietary advisor. Kindly fuck off.

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  3. Check out my blog.... the infinite writer.blogspot

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  4. Jennette perfect loved this blog please write more <3 love you dear

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  5. Could write about his fans, McCurdians <3

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  6. I realize your title is called Malls and Mattresses but you never mentioned any mattresses. Good for you on willpower. Looks like we both are doing that this week.

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  7. I have spend the last 3 yrs in a glutten free diet, and I hate it, lol ! I have intolerance to glutten, but sometimes I dont care is my stomach sufer, Im going to the bakery and eat all I can! So, dont be too hard with yourself, if you want it, go for it!

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  8. I have autism, and I am supposed to adhere to a strict GFCF diet. That's gluten free and casein free. Essentially no wheat or dairy products. I've loved pizza most of my life, but I heard that people with autism, like myself, can't digest these proteins. Apparently these proteins make their way to the brain and can cause adverse behaviors. A lot of parents with autistic children use the GFCF diet as a way to stop them from having episodes. Hard work! All I know is pizza in moderation may be ok for me, but bad in mass quantities, and as long as I am not consuming wheat or dairy regularly I should be ok.

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  9. Welcome Jennette! A blog is so oldschool ;-) but I'll read it :D

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  10. It's the first time when I'm reading your blog and I can say that it gets me addicted. The way you're writing makes everything interesting and fun to read about. You've got awesome writing skills! Thank you for taking time to write these and share them with us. Your little blog posts are completely enjoyable.

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  11. I certainly enjoy reading your posts and I can't help but read it with your voice in mind. I'm certainly not a fan of the low calorie lifestyle, it really tastes bland and lifeless. I feel that if I don't go overboard and keep hitting the gym on weekdays, it makes me feel less guilty about stuffing all those delicious fries and pizzas in my mouth.

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  12. LOL, love this xD That's me right there, Jesus.

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  13. Well I can say you truly won those Wetzel Bitz samples :)

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  14. Lol that end :D

    Anyway,
    Don't be so hard for yourself Jennette <3 Although it's really good to eat organic and healty , you don't need really to loose weight , because your body is fine ! :)

    Of course it's good trying to eat healty For every person of course :)
    >>though I find it realy hard to live without cookies or chocolate or something for a whole day xD

    C'mon Jennette , Let's motivate eachother to eat healtly ! (But first a choco chip cookie.. )

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  16. Sounds like the pros outweigh the con? which is a win! you seem to Love your bed and sometimes Love will cause us to make sacrificial decisions.

    That really sounds awful.. I definitely pity and applaud you all the same for actually being able to get that down because I have a weak stomach and probably wouldn't have been able to digest that...

    Awe don't let people judge-y stares bring you down. It's mind over matter. They don't know your story. Ha, take baby steps.. you'll get stronger :)

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  17. Keep posting, I love to follow your social networks. Kisses from Brazil

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  18. Yeah I bought a tempurpedic also. I try to spend as much time as possible so I can justify the price. Thankfully it is amazing comfortable and I don't mind. Did you get the adjustable base? I got the one that also has the completely useless massager option.

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